Sunday, May 13, 2012

Messy Messy Messy Me

Once upon a time mid-life crises occurred once and only once in a person's life, roughly about the time one reached, wait for it, the middle of an expected lifespan.  Times change however and it seems that life crises occur much more frequently these days.  Some of my friends experience them annually, bi-monthly, weekly, or even daily. I dare say that having a regularly schedule life crisis has replaced all your standard benchmarks for having reached adulthood.
 
And that is where I currently reside, right smack dab in the middle of such a crisis. My life has become a bit of a mess.  Not so much in a physical way. After all I'm currently sitting in my apartment where all the dirty clothes are in the hamper, all the clean clothes are neatly put away. I have a full-time job that treats me well.  I'm showered and dressed, and I have accomplished most of everything on my to-do list.  So when I say I'm a mess, I mean it in a more in a metaphysical way.

I feel as if I am sitting upon a small raft in the middle of a vast ocean without any sign of land or rescue within my view.  I have food, water, and shelter to last for awhile. But the facts are these, I can't stay on this raft forever and sitting here isn't getting me any closer to a destination.   And that my friends is the crisis.  I know that I need to jump off this raft and start swimming, but my doubts and fears are like invisible circling sharks, and so here I sit waiting for the opportune moment to drive in.