"Is there a pig in the office?"
"Was that a sneeze?"
"Did someone fall down?"
"Was that a sneeze?"
"Did someone fall down?"
"No, Aleigh just has the hiccups, AGAIN."
Have you ever heard me laugh? It's hardy, jovial, belly laugh that can be heard over great distances and above a crowd. When I see a funny movie, people often end up laughing more at my laugh than the movie. Now imagine all the sound and energy packed into an intense 1 sec burst--that would be my hiccup.It's so ridiculously loud that people are concerned for my health when they hear it the first time.
"What's wrong?"
"Are you choking?"
"Are you choking?"
It wouldn't be so bad if I only got the hiccups once a year. Unfortunately, I get them once a week, and with no warning. I've tried all the cures. Drinking upside-down, being startled, a spoonful of sugar, eating bread, holding my breath, beating my head against a wall. Nothing works.
Instead, I try to make myself as inconspicuous as possible. If possible I keep my mouth shut which makes the hiccup sound more like a muffled squeak. Since it can still be heard across the room, it's only slightly less embarrassing. This is also how I pick up flattering nicknames like: guinea pig.
There are of course times when I have no choice but to speak and the hiccups, in all their glory, can be heard far and wide. The worst is when I'm on a phone with an important individual.
"I will be send**hiccup**ing that memo, ri**hiccup**ght now."
"Gesundheit"
"Oh it's just the hic**hiccop**cops. I'll be fi**hiccup**ne in just a **hiccup**"
"Why don't you give me a call again after lunch?"
"Gesundheit"
"Oh it's just the hic**hiccop**cops. I'll be fi**hiccup**ne in just a **hiccup**"
"Why don't you give me a call again after lunch?"
Depending on the day the hiccups will vanish after a few seconds or minutes, and I count myself lucky that I am not the next Charles Osborne ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Osborne) .
Until ne**hiccup**xt time.
Until ne**hiccup**xt time.
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5 comments:
I have a cure that I read in a magazine years ago. The article indicated that there are two pressure points that will help to releive the spasming that causes hicups. The first it right at the base of the breatbone and the second is a little notch right below the adams apple on the throat. The procedure is to first apply firm direct pressure to the point below the breat bone for 10 to 15 seconds and then to apply firm direct pressure to the point on your throat for 10 to 15 seconds and the alternate between the two until the hicupps are gone. With me it usually takes once or twice and they are gone.
Don't let this little problem deter from becoming what you were always meant to be :)
I remember that laugh. I can only ima *hiccup* ine how hilarious your hiccups are.
Great blog! It made me laugh - though I don't have your great belly-rumbling laugh! :) - Ali
Okay, I just found your blog. Hillarious post! Hiccups are so much fun aren't they? You're dieing (or think you might be any time soon) while everyone else in the room is laughing. NOT FUN, but FUNNY! So ironic...
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